You are not a bad person. Making mistakes is just a part of life. You are an imperfect person…we all are imperfect. Relax. I’m not sure what you have experienced in your life that makes you want to defend everything and to be right all of the time, even when you aren’t, but it may be time to simply stop. Take a breath and own your stuff. Be honest with yourself about where you could make some improvements.
Honesty is extremely important to living a fulfilled life. It definitely is important in a relationship, whether that relationship is platonic or romantic. When you are able to be completely honest with yourself and own your stuff, you won’t have to fight others on their perspectives and opinions of you, because you’ll be sure of who you are. Often, fighting to be right comes from you trying to convince yourself and others around you to believe an idea that you want to have of yourself that you desire, when in fact, if you were actually that person, you would feel more at peace with someone else misunderstanding you.
I have mentioned before that every person who enters a relationship is selfish. Think about it, you want someone around, someone to lie next to at night, someone to go out with, etc. So, you find someone to keep you company. In addition to that, whenever that person doesn’t do things your way, agree with you, or cater to you, it is a problem.
I say all the time that God gives us free will, but we deny that to one another. Even though we were all made differently, most people, even in adulthood, try to fit in and be like other people. If we really were to accept people for who they are, we would better be able to accept ourselves for who we are as well.
[bctt tweet=”God gives us free will, but we deny that to one another.”]
That means, you would gladly own your stuff, and not see it as such a negative thing. Go ahead, laugh extremely loud when something is funny. Be jealous. Be a super clean and organized person. Enjoy your cartoons and comic books. Strut around in your unique style of fashion. Be you. Own it.
Own Your Stuff In Your Relationship
Relationships would go a lot more smoothly, if each person involved would be honest about what they bring to the table and what they aren’t so great at doing. Arguments pop up, because either one person isn’t being honest about something, or both people aren’t accepting that they are different from one another. My husband isn’t great with handling finances, but he refuses to be honest about it.
I lack consistency in A LOT of areas of my life, but I always give an excuse as to why I wasn’t able to complete something “this time”. When my husband isn’t buying what I’m selling, I get defensive and try to force him to see things my way. BUT I know already that I’m full of it, and should have remained consistent in doing what I said I was going to do. My husband knows that he spends the most money between us, but he gets defensive and tries to justify it, by saying that he didn’t buy anything out of the ordinary.
If we both would just own our stuff, we could realistically come up with solutions to help each other. Until then, we’re in for senseless arguments and holding onto denial about things rather than growing and making progress.
What things have you been in denial about?
I am aNDriea DEnise, the founder and owner of aNDrieaDEnise.com. Though I can be serious at times, I am actually a goofy chick who loves to write, to sing, and to create! In addition to being passionate about helping people create lives they love living, I am passionate about getting my husband to end his love affair with his PlayStation!